Awakening the beast

Like a dark mantle over a calm ocean, a storm of sensation radiates over your inner being as it heightens in sexual anticipation.

The burning electricity in your body sends you into an uncontrollable and unearthly emotional fit.

Unlike weakness, this storm of emotion is attractive and powerful, but there is always a teetering balancing act before bringing on to the brink of madness.

Short of murder or destruction, no outlet is sufficient. The Burning will continue, and it will become unstoppable as the potency corrupts and reconditions the mind to anger and pain as the necessary core foundation. And continuing into fury, this unrest will cause deep uninhibited creative genius.

Such is the unfortunate boon of the Dark Gift, that we make not the release but the pain our pleasure, and so it becomes a self-gratifying addictive cycle that has been liked to thus:


But only a Man can play with fire, in spirit and form, and thus it is the Man who built civilization and rested upon its laurels his women, which God ordained as the dignified Helper but also the Deceiver.

For the woman steals the Apple from the Man and thus cuts off his hair, which is the source of his power.

A highly stimulated aggravation creates then Purpose out of this tumultuous tempest of testitude.

For the ever-present impending culmination of a never-ending search provides the necessary lust and fuel for the “journey,” which is of the Man’s choosing but he must stick with it.

As we all know, the dark energy feeds on itself, and seeks out more of itself.

Thus is why we are never satisfied, for those who partake or pretend to indulge in the fire of kundalini will suffer its snare and become addicted to the very source of addictions itself, providing a horrific pleasure-pain synapse that is never-ending, but upsetting to live without.

Those who choose to play with the fire and then put it out will get burned. It is only through walking through the flames of redemption that one is safe from the fire’s harm.

All secrets of the ancient esoteric occultists can be discerned through a careful cultivation of the fire, and anything less is half-assed study in the name of the god of procrastination, a petty fantasy that pales in comparison to the waves of rage to come.

It is not every man that can endure such a tempest, but for that it is called the Dark Gift.

For while some men are plagued and ended by their attempts to put the fire out, others are rewarded for their seeming-insane attempts to love its warm embrace and ride the extremes that are inherent to such pinnacles.

This is the Knowledge of Good and Evil, the nature of mortality, for those who celebrate life must do so by purging with Death, and yet those who find it is their desire not to die must endure the pain and longing of the gift for as long as they can stand it, and indeed some may find it impossible to return from whence they came.

But failure, caused by the proximity of success and the succeeding inability to continue the charade may lose themselves in the Abyss and commit murder, either of others or of the self as represented by madness.

Such is the lot of the crazed killers and mad geniuses, unable to cope with a forward movement for they lack foundation.

In the fire, life therefore causes death and only death leads to life.

For discipline is the delay of self-gratification and the forcitude of doing something unpleasant without regard to petty mortal desires.

It is such, then, that we can surmise the true meaning behind Jesus’ statement in the Bible:

“For the last shall be first and the first shall be last.”

Not as a condemnation of selfishness, but rather a condemnation of the animal within each and every human being.

There is a separate being inside every Man, a Beast that must be harnessed or given to the wilds in slaughter.

Such is the plight of the human species, for mere cattle in the fields surely do not struggle with such wrought temptation between two conflicting selves.

And yet this is why the Gift is Dark, for itself is what separates a Man from an animal, and thus is why humans are more sex-obsessed than their counterparts and similarly why the world has been made in its image.

Yet those who do not see will continue on in blithe invalidism, a lack of identity and purpose never haunting them because the haunting only tortures those who are the strongest.

And therefore it is in a man’s interest to proclude his quest by first deciding upon his reason for being.

For it is only this demanding Reason that can spur a man through his greatest hell.

And every Man must decide this for his own sake, in his own image.



– James Mast


The Rebel Within

The Rebel is an idea.

The Rebel is what’s emerging beneath the surface. It’s a being, a character you create to replace the old you, the one mired by layers of conditioning and untruth by the world and its media and technology and its ignorant people.

You slowly rebel against the world until you begin to uncover the REAL YOU beneath it all.

It’s the heart of what I made this site about.


Beneath it all…beneath all beliefs and systems of thinking that you subscribe to.

You read things on the net and they make sense. They seem to be true. But do not actually know and they provide comfort where you have none.

When you follow a system to think for you, then you have rules and righteous purpose. You have concepts and ideals, such as “saving the world” or changing it to your own vision of utopia, or being too honest, when honesty is not always a virtue. You become consumed with ego or “respect.”


These things are all only illusions, designed to distract you from trusting your own intuition and true self.


Beneath all the awkward, casual social interactions. Beneath the light, airy, surface world that everyone pretends is real.

Beneath it is the underworld.

It is a red river, a current of distaste.

You are not satisfied with the status quo. You are uncomfortable with your place in it. You want to push the limits.


But to be an effective rebel, you must have a REASON. It can’t just be for guts and glory.

Those things will never build your soul.

You’ve got to have a selfish reason to push yourself through the barriers of the System. Your goals, the things you really desire, those are enough at first. You take ahold of them and then you FIGHT.


But fighting wears you down after a while, and you run the risk of turning into the enemy.

Deep down, despite all you’ve been told, despite the hard knocks you’ve taken, you are something special.

There’s a power in the background, awaiting your total surrender. It calls to you. It tugs at you like a nightmare every damn day and every time you fail to do what you want to do. What you set out to do.

This thing is NOT the thing that you fight.

This thing is the Rebel.

The Rebel is your emerging soul.


Beneath it all, beneath this human shell, you have a heart of rebellion.

You rebel in order to find your soul, the origin of yourself. And then you hold onto that power and don’t let anybody take it from you. And you don’t let imposters like your old self take it either.

You are a rebel to the core.