How to talk to the police in any situation

Don’t talk to the police.

Especially in today’s feminist 1984 environment where we stick cameras in our TVs and people call the cops over the most frivolous things, it’s important to understand the correct and proper way to handle these encounters.

Personally I have had a number of incidents involving police but every time I have managed to evade any kind of ticket or problem, sometimes by refusing to speak to the police altogether.

There is absolutely no need to talk to a police officer.

What they want is for you to suck up like a little bitch boy and tell them all they want to hear, answer all their questions, and give them as much information as possible so that they can find a reason to arrest you.

What’s funny is that after they stop you, interrogate you, and ask intrusive questions they’ll usually ask a question like “What’s with you attitude?” and then they will order you to walk away or be rude to you, even though they are the ones who stopped you.

When police detain you it is an intrusion. It’s a waste of your time and it’s harassment.

I’m a busy man and I don’t have the time to be annoyed by police who are going to invade my privacy, be rude to me, and try their best to accuse me of a crime.

Police are like salesmen.

They find a lead, they get that lead talking, they find out what the lead needs or wants, and then they get a sale.

But in this case a sale means you are getting fined or going to jail, and so you need to make it very clear that you don’t want the cop’s services.

If you’ve ever been in sales, you’ll know that the most common response to a sales pitch or cold call is a polite “I’m not interested.”

With cops I’m suggesting the same thing. When I say “don’t talk to police” it’s not like you just keep walking and seal your lips. There are certain rights you have depending on where and why they are stopping you. We’ll get to those.

There’s a good way to handle police depending on the situation.

1) When police are at your door

If cops are at your door, then lock the door.

Just completely ignore them until you go away.

This is because 90% of the time when cops come to your door they are seeking information in you to build a case. If you answer them or give them any info, then you are implicating yourself.

One time my girlfriend had a warrant out for her arrest because of a traffic ticket that was a year overdue (ridiculous, I know). We were both at home and got into a fight.

10 minutes later there was a definitive, familiar harsh knock on the door that we both knew was police. I told her to just wait it out. 5 minutes later they left and there were no notes, no calls.

You don’t have to speak to police unless they have a warrant.

And the best way to find out if there’s a warrant out for your arrest is to refuse to speak with them.

In the event you’ve done something big enough to have a warrant out without having spoken with any police, then it’s either a misunderstanding or you’ve done something pretty illegal. In that case the police will find you eventually or they will kick down the door.

So with a warrant or without, just say no to police. Lock the door and wait for them to go away, just like you would with Jehovah’s Witnesses.

2) When police are the phone.

Another time I received a call at work from a lady saying that two cops were at my door. “Do you have time to speak to them?” she asked. I said, “No. What’s this about?” She wouldn’t tell me and simply said, “Several people have called the police on you. Can you come speak with them?” I said no. Then, she asked me in a challenging tone, “Why not?”

The implication here is that the onus is on me to prove why I can’t. It’s a sales tactic, but not a good one for someone who doesn’t like to be challenged. I just told her, “I’m not available.” She then said, “Hold on a sec,” and I hung up. I knew that she was going to put me on the phone with police, but I didn’t want to talk to the police.

So just hung up.

Treat a police call like a telemarketing call.

You wouldn’t give out vital information to a telemarketer, would you?

In this case, you don’t even want to identify yourself. If you ever get a call from cops, never confirm anything. Let them only guess that it’s you on the phone and don’t confirm if they ask for your name. Challenge them, as if they are trying to scam you. Find out what they want.

The only purpose of talking to police is to find out what they are after, then get away from them.

3) In a vehicle

Here’s where things get tricky. You do have legal requirements if you’re stopped while in a vehicle.

If they ask you to get out of the vehicle, you have to get out. They are allowed to test for drugs or alcohol. But they cannot search you.

Opening your car door is also an invitation to search your car.

Therefore, before opening the car door, you MUST tell an officer that they are not allowed to search your vehicle and that you are only opening the door to step out.

You also must give them ID and registration.

But, again, they are NOT allowed to search your vehicle or your person.

That includes sticking their hand through your window. That’s not just illegal it’s dangerous. It’s also a possible violation of your right to consent to searches. It may be helpful to record your interaction if you are in a vehicle, unless you sense you’ll just get off with a warning.

4) Being stopped in person

When you are detained on foot or by yourself, you are not required to give any information to the police except to identify yourself, and even then only in certain states.

In California, for example, you do not have to give the officer your ID or your name or address. But keep in mind giving them a hard time increases your chances of false arrest.

The best thing to do is to never show fear, stand tall and proud, look them dead in the eye, give them only your name and home address (or just hand them your ID), and answer ANY other questions with:

“I can’t speak without an attorney present.”

Cops know what this means and they might give you shit, but just stand your ground. Make it clear they won’t get a thing out of you without outright provoking them and often they will leave you alone. Though these are not hard-and-fast rules, since some cops may give you more or less trouble.

Just remember to trust your gut.

Things to always do during a police encounter

1) Record them

Video recording them is likely to land you particularly bad treatment, so I don’t recommend it. But what you can do is record them with an audio recorder on your phone.

That way if they do anything you don’t like then you can challenge them in court.

2) Ask if you’re being detained, arrested, and if they have a warrant

If they balk at any of these questions, there’s a good chance you’re just being detained and they don’t have enough info on you to arrest you or get a warrant.

Also remember that even if police tell you that you are going to go to jail or be arrested or get a ticket, they might just be lying.

I’ve had cops tell me they were going to ticket or arrest me, before telling me to “get lost” 5 minutes later.

They are trained to lie.

3) Lastly: remember the magic phrase.

The magic phrase any time an officer asks you anything is easy:

“You’ll have to speak with may attorney.”

And this is an important phrase to learn for when police ask you questions while you’re being detained and ESPECIALLY if you are arrested or in the police station.

If you find yourself at the station or in jail, use this line and don’t give them any information. Make sure you also tell them you want your free attorney if you do not already have a lawyer. Don’t confirm anything or help them out without talking to your lawyer first, even if the cops promise you that they’ll “let you go if you talk.”

Remember that police are trained to lie and trained to give you a hard time.

They want to make you out to be a fool, as lesser than them, as being “wrong” for challenging them, or as an assumed criminal. They are trained to do this and they act like they have power even if the law prevents them from outright abusing it (though that doesn’t always stop them, does it?)

NEVER believe you are in the wrong and remember that police are just doing a job and they are trained or allowed to be assholes. Stand your ground, assert your rights, and let them tase you or jail you with or without a warrant.

You don’t have to suck up.

Being stopped or called by police is no different than being interrupted by any other stranger or professional.

If they are wasting your time or you don’t want their services, then you don’t have to speak with them. You don’t have to give them any information and it’s up to them to get a warrant on you, at which case there’s enough evidence for your arrest that speaking with them can only be a bad thing anyway.

I highly recommend watching the above video in its entirety. Both a law professor AND a police chief speak about the legal dangers of talking to police, and your legal rights.

They make the point that talking to police is always a bad thing, and never helps you out in any way. There are no positives whatsoever to dealing with cops except as an opportunity to experience fear.

Remember: when it comes to talking with police officers, JUST SAY NO.

Let them get a warrant or let them get lost.



James Mast

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