Should I end it or not?
It’s that kind of thinking that represents an inability to let things go.
“But ending things is letting them go!”
No. It’s not.
Letting things go means it truly doesn’t matter. Things can be imperfect and they can flow and it won’t matter because you have REFOCUSED on something else.
A breakup, for example.
Humans have a tendency to want hard lines for things when there usually are none. Wanting these hard lines is merely a distraction from whatever it is they are SUPPOSED to be doing.
“I just want closure!”
No, you just want more attention.
What a waste of time.
If your girlfriend’s cheating, for example, there is nothing to be done except find a new woman. so if you are hung up on dumping her and how horrible the emotions feel and how she needs to be put in her place, then you haven’t let it go.
It’s eating up at you because you have nothing more important going on. You are attached to transient, ineffable things because of your need for attention.
If you can’t walk away tomorrow and completely forget about something or someone, and just move on, then you are hopelessly focused on something worthless like control or attention.
If a person doesn’t want to be with you, and they cheat, then why the fuck do you care? Just see someone else and forget about them. They might even come back.
If you’re sitting in your room waiting for them to call, you’ve only revealed one of the reasons they might not want to be with you in the first place. But beside that, I feel strongly that the real problem is you’re binding your energy.
Putting all your time and effort into waiting on someone is a demonstration that they have taken over your life, or at least that you have an “unhealthy” attachment. I hate the word unhealthy, but it’s the best word to convey that “putting your life on hold” for anything is weakness.
It’s better than freaking out or wasting yourself.
I’ve seen many people, including friends, make their lives an [anxious wreck][link]. Clothes all over the floor, not getting important things done, excessive worrying. It’s always some excuse:
I can’t move on with my life until this problem is solved!
I don’t care if you know for a fact you’re going to be homeless tomorrow; you’d better clean your fucking room, hit the fucking gym without a care in the world, and do all of the other productive things you need to do. Not to mention that you need to solve the problem of being fucking homeless. But if it’s out of your hands, then it’s out of your hands.
For once I actually agree with those ninnies that say “put your problems in God’s hands.”
I don’t mean ignore your problems. I mean that they should not be “problems.” You should not be so attached to them.
You’ve got to get in touch with your SPIRIT instead of your “life.”
Life is transient. It’s ephemeral. It means nothing. It’s a construct; an illusion at worst.
YOU are far more important than “your life.”
And ironically when people have “shitty lives” it’s not about their life, it’s about them. It’s about the importance they place on things and their egos and their drama and their constant worrying.
“Life” is actually a direct manifestation of YOU, and for everything else there’s MasterCard.
Don’t cry about what you can’t change and stop begging for closure.