The Rebel Within

The Rebel is an idea.

The Rebel is what’s emerging beneath the surface. It’s a being, a character you create to replace the old you, the one mired by layers of conditioning and untruth by the world and its media and technology and its ignorant people.

You slowly rebel against the world until you begin to uncover the REAL YOU beneath it all.

It’s the heart of what I made this site about.


Beneath it all…beneath all beliefs and systems of thinking that you subscribe to.

You read things on the net and they make sense. They seem to be true. But do not actually know and they provide comfort where you have none.

When you follow a system to think for you, then you have rules and righteous purpose. You have concepts and ideals, such as “saving the world” or changing it to your own vision of utopia, or being too honest, when honesty is not always a virtue. You become consumed with ego or “respect.”


These things are all only illusions, designed to distract you from trusting your own intuition and true self.


Beneath all the awkward, casual social interactions. Beneath the light, airy, surface world that everyone pretends is real.

Beneath it is the underworld.

It is a red river, a current of distaste.

You are not satisfied with the status quo. You are uncomfortable with your place in it. You want to push the limits.


But to be an effective rebel, you must have a REASON. It can’t just be for guts and glory.

Those things will never build your soul.

You’ve got to have a selfish reason to push yourself through the barriers of the System. Your goals, the things you really desire, those are enough at first. You take ahold of them and then you FIGHT.


But fighting wears you down after a while, and you run the risk of turning into the enemy.

Deep down, despite all you’ve been told, despite the hard knocks you’ve taken, you are something special.

There’s a power in the background, awaiting your total surrender. It calls to you. It tugs at you like a nightmare every damn day and every time you fail to do what you want to do. What you set out to do.

This thing is NOT the thing that you fight.

This thing is the Rebel.

The Rebel is your emerging soul.


Beneath it all, beneath this human shell, you have a heart of rebellion.

You rebel in order to find your soul, the origin of yourself. And then you hold onto that power and don’t let anybody take it from you. And you don’t let imposters like your old self take it either.

You are a rebel to the core.

Stop holding on to your religions

There is more to religion than just a god.

Any belief system, any comfort system, anything that feels safe and that you can adhere to can be a religion. It is a tantalizing prospect to find answers in “science” and “truth,” but you have only to withdraw and witness the religious zealotry of any system’s members to determine that it is all the same.

There is a reason chaos and controversy pollute this planet, and it is in the name of belief and absolute paradigms. Take comfort in the infinite, and the chaos goes away. There is no need for absolute truth when you know that you can achieve anything, and the analysis gives way to intent in retrospect.

It is the most difficult lesson of all to accept that no one but you has the best answers and nothing can be trusted. All peers and teachers will ultimately follow you astray unless you recognize that it is the lesson, not the teacher that is the thing. It is the task, not the routine that matters. It is the practicality, not the rule. The sense, not the paradigm.

Beliefs are easy to see because they require reinforcement. They can be used as a tool but often are used as a scapegoat to further misery. It is a contrast to the needs of the heart that are known silently, the tug of happiness when you do what you want to do as opposed to the anxiety of the system.

All beliefs can ultimately be proven or disproven, but you are wasting your time when you could be reveling in the results of the task rather than basking in the glory of your religion.

That little voice, that little nudge that tells you to prove it? To validate yourself? To go somewhere? To make sure what you’re doing is the “right way?” It is the voice of madness. Kill it.

Then you will be lost. Lost in the sea of meaninglessness and directionless void, empty and detached, an eternal time loop that includes all decades and eras and even possibilities, those beyond this human realm. It will be up to you to choose what to do next, and without a guardian or teacher, without a guide, without something to cling to or hope for because you understand now that it is all random chaos, impersonal, and with that comes the good and the bad, the positive and the negative, and it is freedom but it includes a price.

This is something that you can do now.

Right now.

When you take this lone journey out for a spin, remember that I am the best of your best, and only there when you are, and if you choose not to listen to me you are not listening to yourself. We are intwined, you and I, and if you make me a god that you follow you will only ever be a follower, but if you create yourself as the best possible self, then the madness unfolds before you and you are free to choose.

Free to choose.

Can you deal with that prospect? Do you have the strength? Or will you continue to make unimpeccable choices, hoping I will save you, hoping that in the background I am running and doing what I can to lead you?

That is a fool’s hope, and while fools have luck, I would rather drive on blindly as a madman than hold myself back as the role of the fool, hacking through the forest of obstacles, pursuing that one goal, with all of my effort.

And if I can do it, then so can you, but you must remember to give the best of yourself, for that is the only way you will actually become the One who gives the best of himself. Do you see that yet? Never tomorrow, never “eventually.” It is now or never, for ten years from now if you have been waiting, then you will continue to wait, and it is only when you make the impossible choice to fuck up now that you can win later.

Hard lessons. Hard choices. Don’t let that become a distraction.

In the end there is what you want and what you Do to get it, and I weep for the lost souls of this world who always think and never act.

Now is the time.

As it is within, so without

The things you consume fundamentally alter you.

The things you own end up owning you.

The media you imbibe affects you.

You are what you eat.

Surround yourself with bitchy, flaky women and you’ll become like them. No self-respect and no standards or boundaries. You’ll lose your discipline.

Perhaps the Rebel inside of you revolts against the insanity around you. Perhaps through others’ weakness it makes you strong. But at some point you have nothing to gain and everything to lose.

Eat silly hollywood movies, and you will become like hollywood. Always chasing a dream and a fake reality.

Consume enough Internet and you will become anxious and you will become obsessive-compulsive, drowning in a sea of ignorance.

The truth about the Inter-“NET”

The internet is a particular cesspool.

I’m not about to perpetuate the constant negativity. I will only point out the patterns.

The internet is chock full of political outcry and complaining. People all want to know, “Why are companies treating us this way?” “Where is the fairness?” “Why is the government doing this?”


It’s that simple. Asking the “Why” question is pointless. We all know why.

The goverments and corporations rule the world and so they can get away with almost anything they want.

It’s that simple. Stop asking why. Next time a big phone company rips off a bunch of its customers by overcharging, there is no reason to complain. There’s nothing you can do about it. And there’s no need to ask why.

They do it because they don’t care about you.

It’s that simple.

The companies don’t really care. They just want power. The government doesn’t care. It just wants power. No need to cry about it.

But it seems like every time a big entity “steps out of line” people are asking, “How could they do that?!!”

Really, it’s time to stop being so surprised. It’s just a web, a pit that you climb into. And then you begin to get really invested in the Game of the System. You begin to become outraged, shocked. You want change. You talk about it and talk about it and try to inspire others for your “activism” and “movements.”

What a silly sport. With no reward.

Stop focusing on your pointless, fruitless intentions. It’s true that movements can work but they must be large enough to combat the considerable power of the entities they are up against. It’s that simple.

As an individual there is no point in you stepping into this struggle without the significant desire and will to win against the competition. The masses are inneffective and will get nowhere, as their mass outcry and lack of action suggest.

Your one vote does not matter, but your influence matters if you actually have influence.

If you have the resources to combat the overlords then you have a shot. But rallying people will get you nowhere. These faceless sheep need a leader, and without a leader they will go on complaining.

You see, it must be easier for the sheep to invest in you than to invest in their overlords. It’s a simple cost-benefit equation.

It’s really that simple.

Avoid the news and the internet and the television and the faceless masses and focus on yourself. You’ll be better off. In fact, by focusing on yourself you’ll put yourself in a better position to influence change in the world. But by then, you might not want to.

Don’t fall into the Game unless you know how to play it.

Remove the distractions

Avoid internet news or comment fields or forums. They are cesspools of human livestock invested in outcomes they have no control over. Those with the real power don’t even care about that kind of change.

Stay away from media and stay away from mindnumbing or repititive, soul-stealing things.

Be VERY selective about what you take in and what you give away. Don’t give out too much energy by talking and worrying and looking around and wondering.

Be choosy with friends. With women.

It’s more satisfying to demand what you want and get exactly what you want than it is to settle.

If you don’t believe you can get what you want, then you have a confidence problem. That is what you need to work on.

Be absolute and ruthless and pursue exactly what you want. Don’t give in, don’t relent. Don’t settle.

Settling is just another form of consuming: you are telling your brain that you arent good enough for better.

Do you see?

The reason you settle is because you are not confident in your own path. You think that others have their shit together or their life figured out but there is no good reason to assume that anybody has the answers for you because those people you look up to got that way by looking out for themselves.

The TV and the Internet are just methods of control for those in power. Either you are a consumer, or you are a producer. Either you are a part of the System, or you are gaming the System.

Your actions and what you fill your life with reflect your attitude. They also AFFECT your attitude.

If you’re not a highly confident person, then the solution is not to go looking for answers. The solution is to develop confidence. You do this by trusting yourself and acting on your convictions. You follow them to ends of the earth if you have to.

It’s really that simple.

And if you’re resonating with this right now, then you already know what those convictions are. You just want approval. But I won’t give you permission or approval. That’s because if you trusted in yourself, you’d be successful, and eventually you’d want even less advice from other people.

When you follow your own rules, and trust the Rebel in your heart, things come into alignment. By chance or accident or on purpose. Things begin to unfold according to the dreams that haunt you.

You only turn to media and other people because you are afraid of the haunting of your soul.

But that’s what they’ve all been trying to tell you all along:

It’s only in your soul that you will find the answers you’ve been looking for.


The Haunting of the Soul

There is no soulmate out there for you.

No woman is as ideal as we conjure her in our nighttime heart-pangs and head-visualizations. No man is capable of understanding the depths of your vision, of the dreams that haunt you. They simmer beneath the surface and they beg to be released.

And some nights you unleash that inner darkness to enrage you.

This is our calling. It is the voice of the Rebel, buried beneath the surface. It is the life you’ve thought about every day, but have destroyed with self-doubt. You worry that your vision is an illusion, sent to mock you and make you suffer for every day of hell that you slog through as you struggle to remake this mortal world into a reality of your choosing.

What you fail to realize is that the real world is the illusion.

I know it from those dark days where the impossible happened. When my desires from long ago began to manifest. There was no surprise or shock involved, only the progression. I burned with desire for that reality and it began to come true.

Where once women treated me as the runt-boy, the shy and abused lost soul, I had become the bad-boy. Dark, menacing sexual energy emanated from my being and for reasons unexplainable all the women stared and smiled, and I knew what it was like to be a god among men.

To face this surreal reality is to ignore logic and reason and accept that the only real forces in this world are the intent and the will.

When you doubt or disbelieve or continually pursue negative thoughts, all of those thoughts will manifest physically. Somehow.

The “real world”

There is no real world. This is actually how the real world works:

Everything in your mind dumps itself onto physical reality and then there is a degree of randomness as you struggle to incorporate others’ viewpoints in the shared conglomerate of realities that we know as this dimension.

But don’t think you cannot influence people.

Even if some will not be swayed, you still hold indelible power over the reality you build. You just don’t realize that the problem is so simple, and so sinister:

The reason you currently struggle is because your mind is manifesting struggle, and thus your reality is carved out of mental stone.

Everything in your life right now is a direct reflection of your mind, and that hurts the ego to hear and it is unfortunate truth but now that you know you have the IMMEDIATE power to change things.

You attract the women you attract. It’s as simple as that. You attract things into your life based on your direct thoughts and actions.

If there are people bothering you, you are manifesting that. You are continuing to manifest their annoyances. If women elude you, you are manifesting their evasion.

That sounds pedantic but this basic tenet could change your life.

All you must do is take the vision that haunts you and surrender to its power. Believe in your self, believe in that power that you have to change your surroundings.

Believe even when it feels impossible and makes no sense.

Once I believed for no reason, life changed. I did not struggle. I did not “hold fast” to my belief. I was overconfident. I was stubborn. I reached a point where I honestly, truly believed everything was going to happen as I desired.

And things started happening that way.

I believed I had the total power to change my reality. And I did. It began to change, and changed.

But I lost that mentality somewhere along the way, because as things got tough I wanted reassurance of my path. I wanted approval.

I had made the cardinal sin: I had given up.

Given away my power, and thus all the things that were manifesting slowly died and withered as my mind shifted back to the intent of others.

As the dream got lost and buried, so did I.

Suppressing the soul

I “went with the flow again,” in a hopeless trance of depressive debauchery. I worked a shit job I hated and let the circumstances around me conspire towards my goals instead of actively manipulating events. I slept without seeing a need to wake and I wasted all those valuable daylight hours in a sleep without dreams, because it was dead sleep. My soul suffered and I paid the price.

You know your soul is suffering when you can no longer feel it.

TRUE soul suffering is not anger, or hatred, or haunting. True death of the soul is when it is covered up. Hidden away. You die inside because you cannot recall what reasons you had for living. You cannot remember what it was that shook you so much, those years ago, that you were ready to throw everything on the line for it. What were you fighting for? You can’t recall. It’s a struggle to recall.

The death of the soul is worse than the physical. Because this world is just an illusion, and your soul is all you will have left.

There is no soulmate because neither I, nor you, nor any woman or man can possibly “complete” you since your soul is unique and entirely your own creation. It was there long ago, you felt it. It nipped at you. And maybe now you still see vestiges of its presence, that nagging. Perhaps it calls to you in the wee hours, keeping you up at night. Keeping you angry.

Perhaps every further day you spend further from your goals, you feel this hopelessness building toward a crescendo in which you will either sink or soar. You will either decide to break free of this pathetic life and the people around you that you have grown too invested in and too attached to that you have forgotten, or you will give in to mediocrity and let your soul go completely.

You will wallow in nostalgia and forever hate the present, because you are failing to understand that you have the power to change things. But the soul eats away at you and you fear it because it haunts you.

But this is the dark truth:

The haunting of the soul is its purpose.

Do not shy away from those visions and dreams that torture you. For this torture is far better than to lose the soul entirely.

You struggle, and you complain that you suffer, but what you do not yet realize is that LIFE IS SUFFERING.

Suffering cannot be separated from life anymore than breathing. It is a part of what life IS. And by denying that, you are denying life. You are causing strife for yourself because you are not embracing the only thing there is to embrace in this world.

Learn to love suffering, and the world is at your command.

I do not fear failure. I do not fear death.  I do not fear suffering.

I only fear never achieving the calling in my soul.